This is a real exchange between my husband and I:
Me: What's that gladiator film with Russell Crowe in it called?
Him: Uh, you mean Gladiator?
And my friends this is why I am lucky to be married to this man. Because if I'm honest I wouldn't tolerate such idiocy in my own partner. Thank god he's more tolerant. Or maybe me being a moron feeds into his ego? Who knows. Who cares? Not me. Well obviously I do as it's my marriage. But I don't care about why we're married. I care that we are married. Cause if we weren't I wouldn't get an anniversary present.
What was that movie called with Steven Martin where he's the father of the bride?
Yeah, that didn't just happen.
It's just a shame that as we age our memory fades. Well, for most things.
Example where it's sad that our memory fades: I can't remember all the friends I was with at my first concert.
Example where it's good that our memory fades: it was a Michael Bolton concert. I don't remember a note.
I'm of the opinion that we forget things because our brains are filling up with info as we get older and eventually it starts overflowing like a pair of Depends on an incontinent race horse. I don't know if there's any scientific evidence to support that. But when was the last time I needed evidence to know I'm right?
Umm... is anyone surprised I don't remember the answer to that question?
So to sum up.
- Russell is in a film about gladiators named Gladiator. Ooh, Hollywood, you're always SO CLEVER!
- My husband is a saint.
- They don't actually sell incontinence diapers for horses but I bet they'd need to be prohibitively large.
- My brain used to be a tall glass of water but now, like an overflowing toilet, it's just full of shit.