Zombie Apocalypse Survival Gift Guide Treasury on Etsy

It could happen, and you can find all the things you need right here on Etsy! Handmade and vintage zombie apocalypse survival kit! Awesome!

So you've got your twine or rope which has tons of uses. Either tying up zombies who you were related to in life and don't have the heart to kill, or possibly to tie up members of an opposing survival group. Maybe even to tie up a member of your own survival group who is getting out of hand. Tons of uses.

Brains? Well, this is something most other survival guides don't tell you about. But pick up some extra brains and you have a great diversion if you ever find yourself cornered by a zombie mob.

Gloves. Yes, I know these are fingerless and that may not be the best choice. But they look way trendier than ones that cover your fingers. Gloves are for warmth and when dissecting zombies. You need to keep their blood off of you so don't just dig into their bowels without gloves on!

You need to find an old farm house and if possible, one with an old truck that works to set up your survival base. Most zombies stay in the cities what with all the great shopping and culture and stuff. So you should be safe here.

A gun and ammo goes without saying. But also make sure to have backup like a baseball bat for when the bullets run out. And they will run out.

Water pitcher. This is for water obviously. You need a container to go back and forth from your hideout to the water source. Why not make it a lovely handmade pitcher? Useful and lovely!

Rocking chair. This may seem like an odd item on the list, but you will be keeping watch on the front porch a lot and it seems like a rocking chair is the best way to do so.

Lighter, flashlight, radio. I think these are pretty self explanatory. If you can't figure out why you'd need these, you're probably already a zombie.

Fashion. This may not seem obvious, but I have a couple of very helpful items here. One, something to cover your neck. It could be your last line of defense when a hungry zombie is about to rip out your throat. Upcycled skirt. What about all those times you may need to pretend to be a zombie? A cool upcycled skirt will fit right in with the typical tattered zombie wardrobe.

And last. Beer. This may not be a part of everyone else's zombie apocalypse survival kit, but it is part of mine. If I have to go, I hope my last stand is at a brewery or at the very least with a buzz on. The pain will be less, and maybe I'l be drunk enough to think the whole thing is just a video game.

1 comment:

  1. hahahaha, found you on etsy stalking coffee cozies! love your sense of humor!
    a fellow weird-o